|All Day Breakfast|
I introduced the high end concept of breakfast at dinnertime to the children last week. An idea that was born out of not having that much in the fridge; apart from eggs, bacon, sausage and mushrooms (not forgetting beans from the cupboard and some old spuds, just starting to shoot).
Plus I really couldn’t bothered to cook anything proper. No dangerous frisking with mandolins. No sous vide quackery. No fine, delicate plating, with micro herbs, using tweezers. No, I really couldn’t be arsed with any of that. So a fry up seemed to be the order of the day. Besides, it was about time that the twins were familiarised with the mighty ‘All Day Breakfast’. Which are arguably the three best words you can ever find on a menu.
But to keep on trend, I decided to announce that we were having “brinner” that evening. As everyone seems to be doing it these days.
Anyway, the response was muted, puzzled and slightly flabbergasted at the whole prospect and it was my son who took up the mantle, to challenge this stray into unfamiliar territory. Dinner is obviously very important to this young chap and shouldn’t be messed with and this was his reasoning:
“Hey guys, I thought we would have something a bit different tonight, how do you fancy some BRINNER tonight?!”
“Brinner Fin! It’s like breakfast, but you have it at dinnertime.”
“What… are we having Rice Crispies for dinner Daddy?”
“No, we are having an English breakfast. Bacon, eggs, beans, you know, the sort of thing we have on a Sunday morning sometimes.”
“Is that healthy?”
“Erm, well, yes and no.”
“Shouldn’t we have porridge instead then?”
“No, porridge for dinner would be silly.”
“Because porridge is silly full stop.”
“Can we have pancakes then?”
“No, you always put far too much sugar and lemon on them and that is not healthy.”
“But we can have bacon and sausages for dinner?”
“But bacon and sausages aren’t very healthy are they.”
“No, they’re not really.”
“Can I have porridge then?”
“Because porridge isn’t dinner…”
“You mean brinner.”
“Yes, I mean brinner, you can’t have porridge for dinner.”
“BRINNER! I mean brinner.”
“Well I am confused Daddy because if we can have porridge for breakfast, why can’t we have porridge for brinner? Because that would be a lot healthier than having bacon and sausages wouldn’t it?"
“You…….you just don’t have porridge for brinner……..that’s all. It’s um, a breakfast…. breakfast food. Not a dinner….breakfast food. I mean brinner. What I mean is Fin, porridge isn’t really what you’d call a…… brinner…. brinner food. Do you get what I mean?”
“Well, brinner sounds stupid then.”
And you know what? He is right. Brinner is a stupid idea. But then again, maybe I didn’t execute the concept clearly. Maybe I am too narrow minded? Maybe I simply have to face up to the fact that I clearly hate porridge. Lots of questions remain unanswered after that night
Didn’t stop him eating the bacon and sausage though.